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a biscuit in the basket

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Aren’t you glad it didn’t say we’re moving again? We are in fact, but that’s not why I’m writing this here post. You see, on top of the good news of Hannah getting the tenure-track gig at SEMO in Cape Girardeau, Missouri, she’s also pregnant. I suppose the coupley way to say it is “we’re pregnant”, but I hadn’t even seen her since we found out, and I’m not the one going through cycles of nausea and insomnia. I’m also not the one who has to look forward to back pain, hemorrhoids, and of course labor. So I think it’s safe to say Hannah’s pregnant and I’m cheering from the sidelines. Thus far she’s been feeling OK, she’s mostly just frustrated because she doesn’t have her usual energy. Naps and nutrients are key at the moment.

As I mentioned, “we’re” about three months along at the moment, but it hasn’t felt real because we’ve been separated by 1000 miles for the last 63 days (that’s about 67 days from conception, sports fans). We’ve just been reunited in Macon where we just told Meg and Sue and Mrs. Hogan. We’ve been holding off with the news so we could tell Jane in person. It was nice to be able to see her face!

If you’re counting, Hannah’s due right after Thanksgiving, so I suppose we’ll all be thankful that she won’t be in her third trimester till the end of what’s shaping up to be a long hot summer. We’ll be making our usual roundabout adventures in late June and early July (if we’re heading your way we’ll let you know), but a little slower cause I’m already a pretty paranoid papa. We’ll probably be making more potty breaks too!

What does this mean for the partnership? Well, it means I’m moving to join Hannah in Cape Girardeau so that I can be on hand to help her ease into her new position at the university, and so I can prepare our apartment for the baby. If you know me, you know that waiting around for a whole semester in a new town, anxious and unemployed, will probably drive us both nuts. So I’m going to dive into some exciting new work and pray that some visiting artist gigs and/or residencies come together so that I can be out of Hannah’s hair at least part of the term. I’ll also be taking on a more active role in the day to day webby stuff of OBI. It’s our other baby, so it’s my turn to care of it. Gotta get into the routine now so that it’ll be easier when the real baby comes.

I know that this has been a relatively sarcastic post, but in all sincerity I’m really happy about the baby. I’ve been ready for kids since I was about 12 and fatherhood is a job I know I’ll be good at. Mr. Mom may be tough, but we’ll make it work. And now, Hannah has been chomping at the bit to contribute to this post. She’s been writing some pregnancy inspired haiku, because she’s Hannah. I think it’s her best writing! Without further ado:

Drive thru fried chicken
all the fries already gone
Check engine light on

 

They all say, “best time
of our lives,” I wonder if
that’s the last cookie

 

For a cheeseburger
I’d even wet my pants. Wait–
I already did.

 

“Pregnancy is a
beautiful time,” But do not
Google “hemorrhoids”

 

this scale is lying
empire waist, here I come
don’t you look at me

 

Raw, pale moon rises.
My belly sweats And swells.
fuck Lamaze, let’s nap

 

shapeless blob unknown
sighted by sound, growing large
you come out of where?!?

 

And finally, one from me:

 

How do I cook for
a baby’s mama who likes
pudding and pickles?

 

I guess we’ll find out! Wish us luck folks!

11 thoughts on “a biscuit in the basket”

  1. I could help but chuckle at “I’ve been ready for kids since I was about 12”, you can definitely tell and I think you’re ‘coach-dad’ skills are going to come in handy! And Hannah I loved your Haiku poetry, this baby’s going to have some pretty awesome parents in my opinion. So happy for you guys!

  2. Life is amazing, it’s been inspiring to watch you both the last few years….living the dream! Congratulations and much love and happy thoughts your way!!

  3. Now this is going to be ONE LUCKY KID to have such delightful , creative and generally stupendous parents!!!! Not to mention the grandparents and great grandmother and so many interested friends!!!congratulations again!

  4. Congratulations to the both of you! This is the cutest and funniest thing I have read in a long time. Mrs.Sanders, if you need anything (hints, clothes (maybe help altering), moving/packing stuff or just someone to talk to), please feel free to call or text me. I’ll be glad to help.

  5. Pingback: Orange Barrel Industries » Print Nugget 2: Al A. Poopy’s Revenge!

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